Layers

The Road Toward Spring City, Utah — November 2022

Layers interest me. Geographically, like those in the above photo taken this weekend. It’s mountains in the near, and in the far. Different light, yet connected in one vista. Lots of brown in this photo at first glance. But again, lots of variance — whites, yellows, blacks, hints of orange, and of course the blue skies.

And then there are layers within myself, groups, and circumstance. Interesting again. The deeply inner relating to the abundant outer that creates perpetual vista of learning — and aliveness.

I’m intrigued by these layers of belief and practice knitted together below. They are familiar to me, particularly from Quanita Roberson, who speaks them often in our shared work.

Underneath anger is so often grief, grief that needs relief.
And in the spirit of “happening for you, not to you.”

What feels very wise to me is the getting to what is really going on. In working with groups for a one time thing, or in guiding over the longer journey, it makes a lot of sense to know that anger exists. However it makes little sense to get stuck in it. It’s not the surface, nor the first layer that matters. I’m glad for Quanita’s commitment and wisdom this way.

So, I find myself wanting to play this wondering with a few other things.

Underneath anger is so often fear, fear that wishes relief.
And in the spirit of “happening for you, not to you.”

I hear Quanita’s voice again with a slight variant. “The world is out to gift you, not to get you.”

Fears of not getting it right. Or fears of looking silly. Or fears of not belonging. Or fears of failing. Or fears of failing others. Or fears of not being true to self.

Underneath anger is so often hurt, hurt that wishes relief.
And in the spirit of “happening for you, not to you.”

Yes, hurt can run the show. Old wounds. Or traumas. That dwell beneath the anger. That live beneath the show. That holds keys to healthy direction. Or movement. Or new starts. Or old starts that take many loops.

One more.

Underneath anger is so often core longing for well-living, well-living that wishes expression.
And in the spirit of “happening with you, not without you.”

I have learned that most people seek to live in ways that promote freedom. And clarity. And kindness. And overall fairness. And love. Oh, how sweet to get behind the anger. Or to befriend it, knowing some added layers of what it represents.

I’m not a therapist. There was a time in my life when I thought that would be my direction professionally. But instead, I work with groups, sometimes guiding the “now” and sometimes guiding the longer arc (the collections of “now”).

There will always be a deeply inner that is essential road to travel when it comes to anger, grief, fear, and well-living. Some of that road is solo in journey. Some of that road is with companions, perhaps in similar journey. Some of that road is with guides, holding us in the turn to self and the turns to each other.

In the spirit of continued learning. For you, not to you.

Layers that animate the vista.

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Gifts of Circle - Question Cardsasd
Gifts of Circle is 30 short essays divided into 4 sections: 1) Circle's Bigger Purpose, 2) Circle's Practice, 3) Circle's First Requirements, and 4) Circle's Possibility for Men. From the Introduction: "Circle is what I turn to in the most comprehensive stories I know -- the stories of human beings trying to be kind and aware together, trying to make a difference in varied causes for which we need to go well together. Circle is also what I turn to in the most immediate needs that live right in front of me and in front of most of us -- sharing dreams and difficulties, exploring conflicts and coherences. Circle is what I turn to. Circle is what turns us to each other."

Question Cards is an accompanying tool to Gifts of Circle. Each card (34) offers a quote from the corresponding chapter in the book, followed by sample questions to grow your Circle hosting skills and to create connection, courage, and compassionate action among groups you host in Circle.

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This set of Note Cards (8 cards + envelopes)  quotes a few favorite passages from poems in In My Nature. I offer them as inspiration. And leave room for you to write personal notes.

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This set of Note Cards (8 cards + envelopes)  quotes a few favorite passages from poems in Most Mornings. I offer them as inspiration. And leave room for you to write personal notes.

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